We have one in the office.

And it’s not dead.

No lie.

I am kinda freaking out about this.

A customer brought it in last week in a tupperware container. While I have spent hours upon hours researching bed bugs, I personally had never seen a live one before. Only pictures.  This was pretty exciting.

And nerve racking.

I watched our receptionist, Rachel, as she smiled politely at the customer that hand-delivered this live specimen to our office for identification. But I could tell that behind that smile she was counting down the seconds until she could douse the sofa on which he was sitting with Steri-Fab. You know,  to finish off any hitchhikers that might have taken a joyride into the office on the customer’s pant leg.

Like I said, this incident happened last week so I was pretty sure the bug had been exterminated a long time ago.

I should have known better.

This morning I learned that my brother Michael, Do My Own Pest Control president, has been keeping the little nasty in a red dixie cup above his desk. There is no lid on the cup. Lucky for me, bed bugs can’t climb dixie cups. He took the cup down to show me and said he is hoping the bed bug will get hungry enough that it will feed on his arm. Hmmmm, great idea. I can see where all of this is going. Once we have all been fed on by a real live bed bug, we can relate to and empathize with our customers so much better. It’s all about customer service.

Sometimes I find it hard to believe that my brothers and I came from the same gene pool.

Update:  The photo at the top is an actual photo of our new office pet, chilling out on Michael’s wrist. Sick.